I hate Christmas. Last year the wife bought me a ‘Rudolf’ umbrella just so she could use the line, ‘It looks line rain dear’. My decision to kick her out of the house was perfectly justified.
In a freakish coincidence, I saw another umbrella as a result of her mother’s gift. I can’t complain too much though, it had a street value of £35.
The Premiership’s very own ‘Rudolf’ will soon be joining me in the miserable corner. Fergie’s title aspirations received a Hammer blow last week; the Villa can land a knockout strike at 9/2.
I’m taking the kids to Villa Park to see young Rooney; it’s the only way they’ll get to see a fat man with a beard this Christmas. Get your claws into Petrov at 16/1 to score the first goal.
Apparently, the Chelsea players are spending a total of £5 on presents for each other; typical flash footballers. A win over Wigan at 4/9 could see the champions on top of the tree on Christmas day.
AC Milan president Silvio Berlusconi has sensationally labelled Andriy Shevchenko a ‘lap-dog’. At least the Chelsea flop is under the thumb of a super-model; I get ordered around by a mad Sweaty. I’m nuts about the 4/1 for a Drogba opener.
Everton have asked the FA to launch an enquiry into Jose Mourinho’s tirade against Andy Johnson; I expect the FA’s report to contain three words.
Like Jesus, Steve Coppell …Read More