Poker God Plays UFABingo and Pick Three!

I wasn’t sure it was him. The cobalt blues and Crocodile Dundee hat hid most of his face, but there was an aura about the man in the rear of the hall at the Stonehenge Bar/bingo parlor on Culebra Road in San Antonio that prompted me to take a closer look. The silver earring in the design of a miniature poker chip hanging from his left ear was what gave him away.

UFA Poker God?”

He cast a quick glance in my direction. “Sit down, son. And keep your voice down.”

“I didn’t know you played bingo.”

“I don’t.”

He had 12 bingo cards spread in front of him and there was a wad of Pick 3 lottery tickets sticking out of a shirt pocket. I waited for his explanation.

“Don’t try the waiting game on me, son. I know what you’re trying to do.

I waited.

“OK! But it’s just an experiment,” he said.

I waited for a better explanation.

“It’s this thing about bingo being legal. I’m trying to figure out how it’s different to lose the rent money at bingo than it is at poker.”

“This is your first visit?”

Poker God leered at me for a brief second then changed the subject. “The game starts in ten minutes,” he said.

I persisted. “You’ve been here before?”

“Fourth time.”

“It’s taken you that long to figure out that bingo is or isn’t gambling?”

“It’s gambling. Same as slots or craps or the lottery.”

“Then you’ve accomplished …

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